Did you hear about the bear that was roaming across southern Illinois?

I was fascinated by this bear. How did he get here? Where did he come from? Did he swim across the mighty Mississippi?

I also asked myself, “Self, where in the world is that bear going? He’s gotta be head someplace, right?”

Most animals have territories. Every now and then, one of ‘em will venture outside of their home base and explore the world. Kinda like us taking a vacation. We have places we wanna go and things we wanna see in a new, exotic location.

I guess that bear just needed a little getaway.

Y’know, for our honeymoon, Patricia and I ventured out of our territory to visit a faraway land. Well, okay, it wasn’t that far away. Actually, it was Gatlinburg, Tennessee.

One day, we decided to have a picnic with a view of the majestic Smokey Mountains. We found a quiet little spot with picnic tables and sat down to enjoy a lovebird’s lunch.

As we dined on the finest cold cuts a newly married couple could afford, I found myself getting lost in Patricia’s eyes. We soaked up the sunshine, breathed in fresh mountain air, and reveled in nature’s serenity.

That is, until we noticed the folks a few picnic tables down bolting to their cars.

We were trying figure out what the commotion was all about. And that’s when I saw him. A big black bear ambling down the side of the mountain and heading our way.

Now, growing up in southern Illinois, this was a foreign sight. The only black bears I’d ever seen were on TV. And in those shows, when bears showed up, the actors skedaddled.

So we did just that. Patricia and I quickly gathered our belongings and headed straight for the car.

But, y’know, that bear didn’t care about us. He saw some folks eating lunch in his territory and wanted to join in.

In retrospect, I suppose the bear-proof dumpsters around the picnic area should’ve been a clue.

Anyway, back to the southern Illinois bear. Do you think he knows that he was a big celebrity? Do you suppose he cares that people shared funny posts about him on Facebook? Or that folks kept snapping photos of him out in the wild?

I don't think so. Truth be told, he was probabaly on vacation just looking for some tasty cold cuts.

Be well. Stay well. And watch out for bears.

Francis Pass

P.S. – What’s gonna travel through southern Illinois next? A kangaroo? An African elephant? Personally, I hope to finally catch a glimpse of Bigfoot.